Oh Maaan…

 

Ok, so I did an annoying thing. If I knew someone who did this I’d be irritated. Prepare to be peeved.

I looked for advice and then I fully ignored it.

I texted Date Guy back.

Yeah, I don’t know why I did it! A guy who leaves you hanging for a fortnight after a date is NOT INTERESTED. I know this, I wasn’t even THAT into him. Why did I do this to myself!?

Its seriously bumming me out. I text him after 36 hours, then he left it 24 hours to get back to me, then I left it a scant hour (I was being the bigger man!) then he text me straight back. We said we’d have a coffee and I said the end of the week would suit me. Now its 8pm on Friday and guess what?

HE’S DONE IT TO ME AGAIN.

No text, no contact. That’s fine, because I was going to back out of it anyway. But we had a date! You’d think he’d have the manners to text me so I could reject him properly! It’s BASIC textiquette! UGH!

Anyway I think the lesson is if you seek advice, take it!

VIVA LA LIFE LESSONS!

Surprise Surprise

 

Oh Cilla, you had it figured out, nobody fucked with you!

So Date Guy is back in contact! Surprise surprise! More than a week after I text him and nearly two since I last saw him Date Guy is back with a bang (well, maybe less a bang, more a mildly apologetic text, but you catch my drift!)

So he wants to meet up again, the last date was 8 hours long, we didn’t do the bold but we had the chats and a few whiskeys and we went back to his place.

One date and then a two week absence doesn’t exactly scream interest. And to tell the truth it kind of put me off the whole internet dating thing. It was quite deflating not to hear from him after I thought we got on so well.

So what do we think? Should I text him back?

Do we allow this kind of thing?

VIVA LA SECOND DATE?

 

So! The date went well! Really well, in fact it was ten hours long. That seems successful to me!

Date Guy is really funny and attractive and smart and cool. We had great chats, he’s interesting and we’re into the same stuff. He has an English accent, which I like. (Basically ANY accent does it for me. Ladies, is this unusual, do you like an accent? Gentlemen, do you HAVE an accent? Either way get in touch in the comment section for God’s sake!)

Anyway, excellent date CHECK!

HOWEVER its been TWO WHOLE DAYS and I haven’t heard anything!

Not one word.

What I need here is a survey: How satisfied are you, Date Guy? Check the appropriate box please! I WAS very satisfied, but with every hour my satisfaction diminishes and my panic grows.

So tonight, with the help and encouragement of a few (dozen) friends, I sent Date Guy a text. This is unprecedented for me. I’m not old fashioned, I don’t think its his job to text first because he’s the dude, but i DO need the validation that comes with that text.

And it feels great to be in charge at least a tiny bit, I can’t control his response, but at least I’ve put myself out there.

So what do you think, what is the etiquette of the post-first-date-text?

VIVA LA SLUT!

Date Panic!

Well! I have a date tomorrow, and I’m excited and shitting an absolute brick.

I havn’t had a date since the photo above was taken, and as you can see at the time all a lady had to do was hold a bunch of grapes in an attractive manner. At the time I was renowned for my fruit fondling (hehe) but now I’m completely out of practise.

Somebody, fetch me a bunch of bananas, I must test my skills!

So what floats the modern man’s boat? And what does he expect? As you can see above, I’m completely open to the kissing of the forearm area. Indeed, the wrist and hand are open for business. Are further indecencies expected of me?

Should I bring my grapes as a back-up plan?

Seriously though, what will we talk about? What will we do? Will I acidently get locked out of nerves? Am I supposed to ask junk about stuff? Should I do the kiss on the cheek at the beginning of the date? Is there anything I shouldn’t mention?

WHAT THE FUCK WILL I WEAR!?

Can anyone help me out here? Anyone have any great first date tips???

VIVA LA DATE!